Not a poet, and you know it *groan*

You know, I so wanted to write a post about how I’m not on that expensive low carb diet I’ve spoken of before, titled Slim Sure, No more!

Then I remembered that it’s called Sure Slim, not the other way around, and I’m not able to think up a good rhyme for that. So instead of being a poetic goddess, I’ll just have to be boring old me.

So the Sure Slim thing petered out. It wasn’t just the boredom or my fierce love of carbs, or even the fact that the seeds were starting to shit me. Or vice versa, if you want to think about it like that. Let me tell you, unless flax seeds are crushed, they go straight through! It was the fact that when I put my intake into a Calorie King, the handy dandy Aussie food diary website, it showed me that about 40% of my energy was coming from fat (from all the seeds), and on top of that, I was getting slightly under 2/3 of my recommended caloric intake each day. Now I understand that to lose weight you have to expend more than you take in, but there was no way I was going to be able to go to the gym and do a sweaty workout for an hour on 1000 calories. Now I understand why SS doesn’t recommend that you add exercise to your day, because while I did feel like I was eating healthily and feeling pretty good, I wouldn’t have been able to sustain a workout on my meagre eating plan.

I am ever so glad that I didn’t sign up. That would have been a huge amount of money wasted. So if you like to do that silly thing where all the money you don’t spend is money saved, well I saved about $1000! Now if only someone would give me that money…

So from here on, I shall refrain from talking about SS. This means if you’ve come here from a search engine, looking for the goss on Sure Slim, I won’t be able to help. In addition to that, whoever it was who came here on the search term “vacuum cleaner the boobs”, all I can do is shake my head in wonder. What will you crazy kids think of next?

I rang Mikey and mentioned this to him, and his response was “Ain’t nobody gonna be putting a vacuum on mah woman’s t****s!” <– my censoring, not his.

And now for a quick comment about clothes. One of the women at my work goes the gym at about the same time as I do. She goes more often though, like twice a day. Insane! Anyhow, we got chatting about clothes and how hard it is to find a decent pair of pants for the larger lady, more so when you’re on a diet and don’t want to pay a lot for clothes that will hopefully only be worn in the short term. She mentioned a store called Autograph, which does clothes for sizes 16-26. She said you can get some nice stuff from them, especially on sale.

Buoyed up by this information, I trotted off to Autograph on Tuesday during my lunch break. And trotted back to work with two new pairs of pants. One pair is synthetic brown three quarter length and came with a massively bling gold chain belt. Mikey has claimed the belt for his rapper alter ego, and I’m totally okay with that. The other pair is a cotton blend in a gorgeous crimson, also three quarter length. You know, I never thought I’d wear crimson, especially on the bottom, but I reckon it doesn’t look half bad. If I’m brave, I might even take a photo tonight. I don’t really have a before photo yet, and I really ought to take one before it becomes in between. Kep your eyes peeled and watch this space – who knows where my bravado might take me!